Since I was young, I was motivated, hard working, and goal oriented. I was on the National Ski Patrol for three seasons. I was an EMT and worked for an ambulance company. I lived in Mexico for two years after high school as a missionary. I was the first person in my family to go to college. I was promoted to a director level position in a multi national company just one year after finishing my bachelor degree. I went back to school for a MBA. I had dyslexia.
Aside from academic and professional endeavors, I spent my free time with my precious children as well doing as much rock climbing, mountain biking, and snow boarding as possible. I also enjoyed mentoring young men at my church. I also became a firefighter.
As I was completing graduate school, I was recruited by the FBI. I graduated from the FBI Academy in Quantico, Virginia and spent my career in Los Angeles and Salt Lake City. I worked on the team that protects the US attorney general. I worked public corruption matters, hunting corrupt city officials, police officers and politicians. I worked complex undercover operations, once running a Hollywood movie studio. I investigated Mexican drug cartels, seizing loads of money and narcotics. I helped rescue slaves forced to work in quiet California neighborhoods. I responded to active shooter situations including the San Bernardino terrorist attack. I received further EMT training and was embedded with the SWAT team. I was also part of the Behavioral Analysis Unit.
Despite my success and the good things going on in my life, I struggled. I had an ugly divorce. A judge allowed my children to move out of state despite my desperate attempts to keep them close to me. This was the hardest thing I have ever dealt with. I began a relationship with someone who was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. We had a child together, then another. She was often angry. She tried to keep me from loving my older children. She tried to threaten my job. She was emotionally abusive to my older children. I wanted to leave but when I did, she would keep our two little boys away from me. I felt broken financially, spiritually, and emotionally. I felt imprisoned. I felt afraid. I felt hopeless and helpless. At one point, I found myself on the phone with the LA County Shreriff’s Domestic Violence Hotline. I spoke with counselors and security personnel at the FBI about this. I felt isolated. I was depressed. I felt like I lost my children forever.
Unfortunately, I know some of you reading this can relate. She eventually lost custody of the children and I became a single full time dad. I was free. Or, so I thought. I was co-dependent and found myself hoping she had changed, and then finding out, time after time, she had not. Even after separation, I made bad choices and continued to feel victimized by her.
I left the FBI after nearly 12 years and became a Private Investigator and worked with men in very similar situations as my own. I found men everywhere are suffering as I had suffered. Sometimes more severely.
I started learning about how my thoughts create my feelings. I sought life coaching. I became certified as a life coach. I relied on my spirituality and ability to manage my thoughts to overcome my challenges
. Eventually the clouds began to part and the light began to warm my soul. I learned how to find peace, happiness, calm, love, contentment and connection. I’m not sure things have gotten any easier but I have found a way to create the feelings I want in any situation. Those feeling drive me to take positive action and yield amazing results.
Today I am focused on being a good dad. I met a woman who is beautiful, inside and out. I know God knows me and loves me. I am finding success doing things I want to be doing. I feel loved, connected and motivated.
I am now focused on sharing my experiences and providing support to those suffering as I have suffered. You are not alone. I can help you. I feel that with my law enforcement background, my experience with my past relationship, and my life coaching knowledge, I can help you navigate through the mess you are in and regain hope and happiness again.